7A: How Many Times Have You Failed?

                I grew up with an NFL playing stepfather who seemed to be great and succeed at everything.. you could imagine the pressure. Pressure to be great just like him, pressure to dominate at every aspect of football just like him.. I’m convinced that his greatness is the only thing that kept me from playing football until high school. I said to myself I don’t want to be great like him, I want to be remembered for what I’ve accomplished, for the athlete that I am. I never wanted to stand in the shadow that was to the far right of the spotlight of glory that stood over my stepfather’s head every step he took. How could I ever live up to the greatness and glory of the “greatest athlete to ever play in Waterbury, Ct” or the “greatest wide receiver to ever come to Southern Connecticut State University”?? Seemed impossible to me, so gymnastics was my scapegoat.. My way to be great at something I wanted to be great at. I was scared of letting him down, scared of failing to be what he was.

                A time passed where I said to myself I can’t be afraid to fail to live up to what he was, so I used his success and greatness as motivation. It motivated me to never look at failure as an option. My stepfather said the same words to me at every gymnastics competition and every sporting event I ever competed in.. “Pick your head up and get going.. failure isn’t an option for those who want to be great. Because when greatness is around the corner, big time players make big time plays.”  I’ll never forget the first time he said that to me. I was 11 years old competing in my first nationals ever at the University of Florida and it was the day I experienced my first failure ever in the sport of gymnastics.. I came in second in the all-around and those word stuck with me. It seemed so weird to me because I had just failed and here he was telling me failure isn’t an option.. he motivated me to be great, motivated me to take that loss to heart and take it extremely personal; the loss hurt him more than it hurt me; I’m convinced of that.

                High school came and I decided to play football, unafraid of failure I was out there playing football to have fun, not worried about his achievements just trying to have fun and try new things. Out there just playing led me to one of the greatest high school football careers in NVL history. I set records, won athletic accolades, broke his records.. and here I am now at my father’s alma mater, in college using his records that he has at SCSU as motivation to never accept failure even though I know that the greatest fail every day of the their lives.

                Today I feel like people are teaching that failure is an okay thing to kids at such a young age, giving out trophies to everyone on losing team, telling kids that there was no winner or loser. That’s not okay. No matter how young a kid is, he needs to know the final score of the game he just played in, he needs to know that he just lost.. because when he enters reality and loses for the first time he shouldn’t think it’s okay. Kids are too protected from failure. I know in class I always say it’s unacceptable to fail, which it is, but if you’re going to fail and lose at least acknowledge it and use that failure as the biggest motivation possible.

                Failure has been my motivation since day one, I’ve failed so many times that I’ve seemingly become successful from it; it’s weird how things work in the end. Like Michael Jordan once said "I've failed over and over.. and that is why I succeed."